New Years depression is real, and more common than you think. As we approach 2024, I’m reflecting back at the previous new years’.
Gosh, I do feel sad.
There Were No New Years, Only New Years Depression
This was me, for a long time. The lead-up to the new year filled me with agonising dread. I remember thinking, “I can’t be like this for another year.” Something needed to change, but how? New Years Depression and anxiety was all I knew. I only focused on the “reality” that time was slipping away and I was still struggling. This fear made me desperate for time to slow down, stop, or go back, and the reality that it couldn’t and wouldn’t sent me into a spiral of hopelessness.
A Time Of Reflection.
This time of year can trigger us to reflect more. What went well and what we think didn’t. I would look back on situations I thought I failed in and decisions that got me no closer to the happiness and peace I wanted. The perception I had of how the year went only caused me to beat myself down even more than I was already doing. A lot of us have the unhealthy habit of focusing on what we haven’t achieved instead of what we did. I was no exception. I remember feeling my heart sink in my chest and a wave of sadness wash over me as I watched the countdown on TV; I could only think of my moments of weakness.
Thankfully, breaking this cycle has helped me self-reflect in a much more hopeful and compassionate light. Introducing intentional gratitude has been so beneficial in taking stock of my silver linings. By showing appreciation not only for the world around you but for yourself, you’ll be able to take stock of your moments of strength too.
Change Is Inevitable.
Our brains are wired to find peace in the known; it helps us feel safer, and moving from one year into another is one of the biggest changes we face. We are having to let go of a whole year and enter a new one, not knowing what it holds. As a chronic overthinker, this uncertainty only made me panic more. Not knowing what’s to come felt like being pushed into the deep end without knowing how to swim. I was someone who needed to know if something was going to work out or not because I couldn’t face feeling more emotional pain than I already had.
I’ve now learned that change and the unknown are inevitable, and I continue to learn on accepting this. If I try to “protect” myself from negative outcomes, then I only programme myself to fear them. Life will be filled with setbacks, obstacles, and uncomfortable feelings. We can make it easier on ourselves if we learn to embrace the possibility of them.
Addressing New Year’s Depression, and Mental Health In General, Is Easier Said Than Done.
I get it; trust me, I really do. I read self-help books, listened to podcasts, watched motivational videos, and attended therapy. But until I truly recognised that I had to put the work in, everything I was taking in was white noise and, unsurprisingly, didn’t make a lasting impact.
Mindset Influences Outlook.
I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: mindset is key. New Year’s depression, and depression in general, makes you more susceptible to assuming things will turn out negatively. If you anticipate a bad year, most likely you’ll attract a bad year. Once each new year started, I would already be pre-emptively preparing for more of what I had been enduring the previous year. That mindset kept me in a darker space. Now, looking back, I realise how my pessimistic, victim mentality only closed me off from the empowering and hopeful outlook I embrace now. It’s like the old saying goes, “Negativity breeds negativity.”
I know that reading a piece of writing may not grant you the wake-up call you need to turn life around, I just hope it grants you some solace that you are not alone in how you feel about the coming new year or just life in general. I hope it helps you see that life can be turned around.
You just have to be willing to try.
Does New Years Trigger You? How Do You Cope? I’d Love To Hear Your Story. Let Me Know In The Comments, Or Just Fill Out A Contact Form!
If I try to “protect” myself from negative outcomes, then I only programme myself to fear them. Life will be filled with setbacks, obstacles, and uncomfortable feelings. We can make it easier on ourselves if we learn to embrace the possibility of them.
And there it is.
This is me to a tee or is it tea. Anyway you’ve hit the nail on the head and I’m willing to work hard at changing my mindset in order to not live in fear.
Today I lost my temper with Lucy when cracked the screen on the TV. I wasn’t nice when it was just an accident. I have vowed to be a better dad and turn my life around before it’s too late. I want my daughters to know they’re loved and supported and also have laughs and fun times.
Wishing you a happy new year and all the good (and bad which I’ll embrace) it has in store.
Bring it on!
As the frank turner line goes;
I’ve no new tricks, yeah I’m up on Bricks but me I’m a machine and I was built to last.
Exactly, it’s not like we’re saying to all the crap; “go ahead, come on in, trample me,” but more ” come on in, I can take it”
It does take continual refocus and mindfulness, but it will start to become more habitual.
Also, try not to be too hard on yourself for slip ups, the fact that you can see the slip up, know it’s not how you want to be, and come back, shows you’re more aware than alot of people already.
That’s one of the priceless things parents can give their children. Unconditional love. No matter what mistakes they make, they know it will never affect the love their parents have for them.
Wishing a hopeful and ‘committed to being better’ 2024, too.